"Relationships..." Pt II
Relationships are both an achievement & a reward...
(The photo is of a sunrise over Blackett’s Ridge: a site in the Catalina Mtn foothills on one of my cycling routes here in Tucson AZ… “sunrise” is also a common metaphor for “beginning” or “renewal”…)
I’ve argued that relationships are constructions, in the sense that they have to be “made;” so they’re also subject to a form of “aging:” it’s both easy & common for partners in a relationship—especially males—to become used to the existing pattern of a relationship…
This “used to” also frequently means “dependent upon:” so it’s likely that one partner can remain unaware of changes that affect the other partner’s experience of the relationship
But being “unaware” can also be a sign of fear: people routinely come to need some things not to change, even though this need is contrary to the nature of life; it may also be an obstacle to engaging in the task of renewing relationships
Let me reiterate: change is the condition for living at all; hence my advice to “embrace change”
And change is the reason relationships cannot be formed “once & for all:” the work required is not like completing something but more like automobile maintenance
Maintaining anything demands regular, if not continuous, upkeep
Even so, none of us can fully live without relationships: they both sustain human life and make it worthwhile
Of course it’s possible to live all alone, but it’s no fun…